Stephen Graham is the talk of the town, thanks to his role in Netflix’s new hit drama Adolescence.
But the 51-year-old’s journey to mega stardom could have ended when he was just 20 after a struggle with ‘really bad depression’ led to a harrowing suicide attempt.
In a heartbreaking clip, the actor revealed he tried to kill himself while in the grip of a severe breakdown brought on by loneliness and intense acting techniques.
Opening up to BBC Radio 4’s Desert Island Discs in 2019, he said he was thankful the attempt had ended in failure, adding how he seemed to hear his deceased grandmother shouting at him in that life-or-death moment.
‘She shouted, “Stephen” and I thought I’d gone… I just come to and opened my eyes,’ he said.
The A Thousand Blows star then emotionally recounted how he attempted to hide the signs of his mental health struggles from his parents.
‘I put a high neck jumper on, one of those zip-up jumpers, and my mum and dad came back and then my mum saw it and she said, “what’s that?” I then just really opened up and everything just came out and I said, “I don’t know how to cope”.’
Adolescence, written by Graham and Jack Thorne, was only released on Netflix last week, but has already made waves and earned huge praise
Graham, born in Lancashire, said the breakdown had been partly driven by feeling isolated after moving to London.
‘I had a breakdown. Going to that big London to do it on your own,’ he said.
This, combined with acting lessons encouraging him to draw on ‘intense’ personal trauma to add authenticity to his roles, had brought on a form of ‘induced psychosis’.
‘My little brother had just been born. My mum and dad had lost a little boy (at birth) three years before. My Nana had passed away when I was 14,’ he told The Sunday Times in 2019.
‘I was in the big wide world on my own and it wasn’t easy. I was very close to my mum and dad and I think with the kind of intense work we did, tapping into emotions that I’d never really tapped into before.’
He added: ‘I had a breakdown with all of these traumatic things that had happened from my late teens.’
Returning to his parents’ home shortly before his suicide attempt, he said he’d never forget opening up to them about his struggles.
‘Then I went back home. They (his parents) were trying to see what was happening with me,’ he said.
Opening up to BBC Radio 4’s Desert Island Discs in 2019 Graham said he was thankful the attempt had ended in failure, adding how he seemed to hear his deceased grandmother shouting at him in that life-or-death moment. Pictured here with host Lauren Laverne
‘I’ll never forget the tears coming down both their faces.’
Following the failed attempt to end his life, Graham’s family and friends rallied around to offer support.
It was also shortly after this incredible low point that he started his relationship with his now wife Hannah Walters, who he married in 2008.
‘She knew what had happened. She was always in close contact with my mum,’ she said.
While they had been ‘just talking’ for a long time, they hadn’t been on a proper date, something Graham remedied shortly before she was due to move to Spain.
‘We were waiting at New Cross train station and I said to her “please don’t go to Spain. I love you”,’ he said.
‘She went “I’ve been waiting for five years for you to say that.” The next day we moved in together.’
But Graham added that his own struggle had given him an appreciation for the feelings many people struggle with.
Following the failed attempt to end his own life Graham’s family and friends rallied around him to offer support. It was also shortly after this incredible low point that he started his relationship with his now wife Hannah Walters
For Graham, the This Is England (pictured in the film) script would often leave him ‘crying his eyes’ because it would dig up painful nightmares of the racial abuse he suffered
Men were at far higher risk of taking their own life than women, accounting for about three quarters of suicides recorded in 2023. This graph shows the suicide rate per 100,000 for men (light blue), women (dark blue), and the combined population (blue) over time
‘I know the loneliness, isolation and feeling you can’t cope in the world,’ he said.
Graham has also previously opened up about how challenging roles have taken a toll on him.
He has admitted ‘losing himself’ when he starred as racist skinhead Combo in Shane Meadow’s 2006 film This is England.
Graham said he turned to alcohol to cope with the pressure of the role, recounting how he would come home and ‘cry my eyes out’ after filming intense scenes.
The father-of-two, whose grandfather was Jamaican, had himself suffered racist abuse as a child due to his heritage.
He told The Sun: ‘I’m mixed race. As a kid, I was called horrible words that I don’t even want to say, and little monkey boy.’
Graham has also revealed he suffers from dyslexia — a learning difficulty that causes problems with reading, writing and spelling.
‘I have to read it and read it and read it, then make it look like it’s the first time I’m saying it,’ he said.
According to data from the Office for National Statistics (ONS) about one in six adults in the UK experienced moderate to severe depressive symptoms in 2022.
Official ONS data recorded just over 6,000 suicides recorded in England and Wales in 2023, the most recent figures available.
Men were at far higher risk of taking their own life than women, accounting for about three quarters of the total figure.
Suicide risk for men peaks between the age of 45 and 64 with 22.4 deaths per 100,000 males.
This is about triple the rate seen in men and boys aged 10 to 24, which recorded 7.4 deaths by suicide per 100,000.
Reasons why men, and particularly those in middle age, are at increased risk of suicide are complex.
But Professor Nav Kapur at the University of Manchester’s Centre for Suicide Prevention, previously told MailOnline perceptions about masculinity among this generation could be playing a part.
‘They grew up with strong, silent, stoical fathers and male role models, but they’re living in a society that now values open, sharing “new men”,’ he said.
‘They are a gap generation left not quite knowing who they are or how to be.’
An estimated 6,000 Britons and 48,000 Americans die by suicide each year.
UK: For help and support, call the Samaritans for free from a UK phone, completely anonymously, on 116 123 or go to samaritans.org.
US: If you or someone you know needs help, the national suicide and crisis lifeline in the U.S. is available by calling or texting 988. There is also an online chat at 988lifeline.org.
